Pizza Recipe

We've been horrible at blogging. I know. No excuse really. Just too lazy to keep up with Facebook, Journal, Blogging...oh yeah, and LIFE!!!

Deb is sick and tired of our usual meals. It's time to switch it up a bit and try some new dishes. She made Beef Wellington on Sunday and it was DELICIOUS!!!! We felt like real fancy folk for the night. We saw them make it on Hell's Kitchen and thought she'd try it.

So, we want to make homemade pizza next. So, if you have a pizzz crust recipe you'd like to share we'd love to try it!!

Decisions...Big Decisions

So, this week it seems like there is so much on my mind I might pop!! We are trying to decide if/when/where we should move. We want to adopt a baby and so we are considering maybe becoming Foster parents and then eventually adopting the right child when he or she is brought into our lives. BUT...we need a bigger house. We miss our old ward so much, but we are starting to get to know people a little better in our new ward. But, would be open to moving into a new ward if the right house and situation came about. We also want to keep Maddy in the same school district so there are just so many things to consider. Sometimes I think being a grown-up is very hard. Friends, if you could do what you ALWAYS do best and keep us in your prayers. We want to make the very best decisions so that we can be on the right road to eventually having the little boy or girl that belongs in our family!

Great Start!!!

Yesterday was my first check in with the doctor. I LOST 5 POUNDS!!!!! I lost fat and not lean muscle mass which is very important. I am so excited! It isn't a lot I know but it just means I am on my way!!!

Every pound I lose is what motivates me to lose another!!! Have a great weekend!

1000 calories a day!!

So I met with the Dr. last week. He put me on a 1,000 calorie a day diet and I am exercising 6 days a week right now just working my way up to 30-45 minutes a day. I even roller skated last week and Madyson's birthday party - thought I might die afterwards - I am definately older than I used to be but it was such fun exercise, I think we should do that more often. I did cheat a little over the weekend but today - back to the grind. IT's still too early to see any results of course although I am feeling very motivated and also feeling like I am a little more energy from day to day.

Meeting with the Dr. really hurt my pride. My weight falls in the "morbidly obese" category - not ever something a person wants to hear. But, for me, it just motivated me to change. Thank you so much for all of the support and encouragement in this. Deana I would love to walk with you anytime! Until it gets hot that is - then - I am not doing the outside thing!!! I am a wus!

Week 2 - The Journey

So, I think I might do weekly diet entries instead of daily - "there's just nothing to say" that often. (Our new favorite quote from the movie - "Couple's Retreat" - hallarious!) Anyway, back to less entertaining topics - (haha)

This last week was a start - slow start - but it was a start. I gutted out the pantry and even threw away the chocolate peanut butter ice cream. It kind of freaked me out when I thought to myself as I was throwing that way - I need this ice cream - kind of a small panic feeling - THAT IS NOT HEALTHY!! News flash!
So this week, the next step! I am going to be walking everyday this week, even if it's just for a half hour. I see a new Dr. on Wednesday night to begin the medical weight loss program and also will be getting a little counseling to help me begin new habits and make sure that I am not eating for the wrong reasons. Those of you who have known me for a long time might know that this has been somewhat of a struggle for me off and on my whole life so I want to learn through this process this time. I want to make sure that my relationship with food is a healthy one. I have been thinking back over my childhood and realized that when big things happened in my life - I really did deal with it one way or another with food. I have always been active and at times quite healthy but I think in our society - so much of what we do incorporates food. I need to remember that I am eating to live!!

The exercise issue is a big one for me lately and thinking about it makes me kind of emotional. I actually LOVE to be active. I enjoy exercising once I am doing it. I have been living in pain for so long however that it is hard to move through that pain and get moving if you know what I mean. It is something that is so important for us to do and I need to make myself do this. I am looking forward to starting to swim with my friend Bethany - she is so patient and also honest so she will not let me wimp out. That will be good for me.

Thanks for taking the time to read - I hope this journey is helping more than just me. I know that the love and support you all are giving me helps me everytime I feel like it's not possible. Baby steps and consistancy - that is what I need right now. Looking forward to Wednesday!!!

A New Journey...Day 1

So, I went to the Dr this morning for my follow up from my stomach surgery. Things are still healing but he said it's going well - finally. The incision collapsed from all of the fluid that was trapped in there and wants to open me back up in months to fix it. Not something I am happy about AT ALL - but it is really ugly right now so might be a good decision. The Dr. then asked me - do you want to get gastric surgery - you need it - I strongly recommend it. Not something you want someone to ask you at all and really hurt my pride. But then, as I look into the mirror - I honestly am heavier than I have ever been in my entire life and not healthy at all. I want to feel good about myself again so...I am going to embark on a new journey and I am going to record it on our blog so that I can look back as I go and learn from this experience. I am hoping that as I do this, I can learn about why I am in the shape I am so that I can prevent myself from getting back to this place again.

I also want to record this on our blog because I am hoping that as I go down this journey that any of our friends who want to join me, can have some place to go for support. I have the most amazing friends in my life and I always know that if/when I am having a down day or things get hard, that I can look to my friends for support and encouragement and I have a feeling that there will be more than a few of those days. Maybe I can offer support to someone else and hopefully I can draw on the support from my wonderful friends (and husband who is also very supportive).

So today is day 1!! I am going to gut out the house of the goodies and comfort food that has accumulated over the last few months while I have been dealing with health issues. I can't use that as a crutch to be unhealthy anymore. I have made the call for an appointment with my Doctor who also has a medical weight loss clinic and will check back in regularly to record my progress. Anyone want to join me? Let's make this year a year of becomming healthy physically, mentally and always spiritually. Encouragement only!!! Here I go!!

Walking The Boys...

So, today I took a step back towards the real world. I took the dogs for a walk!!! It was a beautiful day and it felt so good to get out in the sun (cool sun I must add) and breath in fresh air. It about kicked my butt and I am pretty exhausted tonight BUT I felt like it was a step in the right direction and I am going to go every day from now on!!

Mike has started walking again too. I am so proud of him. He is a really good example to me of someone who once he decides to do something, he comits and just does it!!! Maddy is getting ready for her 12th birthday in a few weeks. She wants to have a roller skating party - ahhh my kind of party!! Gonna be a BLAST!!

Club Volleyball...the beginning of a Dream!!!

So Maddy has decided that she has a dream! She wants to play volleyball for BYU in college! Wow! Go big or go home, right??? Well, she has started playing club this season and I have to say although it will just sound like we are partial but she has some raw natural talent. She has so much to learn but that is the best part - the journey!

So Maddy started the day off as the first server, made the first game point and yes, all of you who know me, I stayed true to Debbie form - got a little teary - was so proud of her and knew she was nervous and scared and she just stepped up and played the game. We were so proud of her.

Maddy is playing for the Mesa, Jackrabbits. She has some friends on the team from our old ward so it has been fun for her to re-connect with them. The first tourni. was in Prescott, AZ and Maddy and I went up with Milena - such a dear friend - at 4am and Mike joined us a couple of hours later. Cat and most of their family came as well so Maddy had a nice little cheering section.

Am I crazy??? Of course NOT!!

So, I decided I am going to make the most of being down like I am. The Shingles has been no fun and because my skin hurts and my head hurts, I have slept about 5 hours in the last 3 days. It is 4am and I am awake and wishing so badly that I could sleeeeep!! The positive however is that since I have been awake so much, I can let the dogs out in the middle of the night so for the last two nights, Mike has actually had good full nights of well needed sleep for him.

I have been focusing my time on Primary this week. I have finished my Singing Time outline for the year, finished 5 out of 9 posters to teach songs for the Primary Program and cut and lamenated and then cut again all of the pictures I have collected from the Ensign and calendars, etc. I am feeling so productive and prepared for teaching the songs now that I am really excited to get to go back to church and do my calling. Unfortunately it is going to be a few weeks before I can go back but - I will be ready.

Maddy has been an amazing trooper. Even though I am so incredibly boring and a bit crabby, she has been so helpful and mostly cheery!! Mike is amazing as always although since i have been down so much, it seems like I have so much time to think, I feel like I am obsessing over his health and him taking care of himself and keeping up all he has done to get healthy again. Is is just me? Am I totally psycho? I just don't ever want to loose him to health issues. I love him so much and, ok, I am obsessing. Get me out of here!!!! Oh how I would love to go to dinner or somewhere normal and out of this house. Sooon, I know, soon.

But, my spirits are up from where they were a few days ago and tomorrow is the weekend so the family will be home and we can just chill together.

Are You Kidding Me??? Nothing But Shock Right Now!

So, this week, a few CranioSacral clients on the schedule, heading back to church next Sunday and excited to do Primary again - woke up Monday morning with the left side of my face swollen and extremely painful. Bumps on my face and had and feeling like I had been hit by a truck! I still went and worked on two clients - gotta get the work done, right?? Still felt progressively worse so called the Dr on the way home. It took him all of like 3 minutes - you know what you have right??? I'm thinking maybe - ear infection???

Uh, you maybe wish - SHINGLES????!!!!!

I cannot believe this. I am frustrated, sad, numb and yet trying very hard to put my Faith in the Lord that there is a reason all of this is happening in our lives. I am SO TIRED of feeling like a burden to my husband and not being able to do the things that NEED to be done. I am getting so tired of being in one form of pain or another from some lame sickness. I know the Lord blesses our lives and I know we are not alone through this. Thank you to all of our wonderful friends who call and check on us, stop by and spend time with us and in many small and some big ways, show your love and support to us all the time. We are so blessed to have you in our lives.

Thanks for letting me vent. I gotta have the down moments so that I can pick up and deal - yet again. Could be a long 4 more weeks????? Let's hope not!

Finally Drain Free!!!

So we went to the Dr. today and at first he was still not going to take the drain out. There was still more fluid draining that he wanted but was concerned that after 3 1/2 weeks I might get an infection in the mesh. Initially he told me one more week no matter what. Then as Mike and I were getting ready to leave he came back in and said, "forget it, I am taking the damn thing out!" I was so excited!!!!!

Mike couldn't watch, he gets quite queazy over this stuff, but took the drain out and patched me up!! I still have an open incision but that will be healed up in a few days and in the meantime I will continue to change dressings and take it easy. But then...ALL DONE!!!!

One More Week

Today we went to the Dr. office thinking that Iwould be getting the drain out of my stomach. Nope! One more week. I left today so upset. I totally fell apart when I got home. This was supposed to be a two week ordeal and 5 weeks later I am still not done. I am so scared that I am not going to have any clients left when I am ready to go back to work. Mike has been always amazing and so has Maddy. So, what did I do? After crying for a long time, I cranked up the ipod and started cleaning house. Rearranged, dusted and for at least the front part of the house, got it done. It felt better to sing at the top of my lungs and at least get something done. I am in a lot of pain tonight but I am convinced it was worth it! So that is the update - more of the same. Thanks for letting me vent a little. It helps to get it out as a very dear friend told me this evening.

My New Project!

I am finally feeling like I am on the road to recovery from this surgery. I have had a LOT of time to think and ponder and 2010 is going to be my year for growth. I feel like there are projects that I need to get done, I am setting a goal to go out and make new friends and take a LOT more pictures. I want to write in my journal more, like everyone else, I want to exercise more - I want to make more memories and serve more. These are my new year resolutions and I am starting right now. While down, I have started working on my cookbook - a collection of my favorite recipes.